Science: the inexact science

I can believe this shark is old:

It appears that its skin is beginning to decay while it is still alive. This article explains that the shark’s age was determined by assigning one year to every centimeter of the shark’s length. It then amazingly claims that the shark is 512 years old, while the headline proclaims it was “born before Shakespeare”! That is an astounding revelation and makes the mind really begin to think about all of the things that have occurred throughout history while this creature floated around the oceans. That all come to a screeching halt when reading this sentence:

Experts used its length - a staggering 18ft - and radiocarbon dating to determine its age as between 272 and 512 years old, according to a study in journal Science.

This goes from being an amazing story to not much of a story at all. That’s essentially claiming to have discovered a 170-year-old human, only to later admit that the person may only be 90 (which used to happen to Strom Thurmond quite often). I wonder if such imprecise measurements could be used in other professions. 

Track & Field Judge:

“The runner for Kenya has set a new world record in the 1-mile run with a time of 2 minutes and 48 seconds, but the time might have actually been 4:02.”

Police Chief:

“The suspect is between 4’2” and 6’11” with either long or short hair between the ages of 25 and 62, and is either black or white.”

Pilot:

“Today’s flight from New York to France will be approximately 3 hours.”

Everything is racist

Including cereal boxes. According to this story in USA Today, someone got mad at the racial insensitivity of a Corn Pops cereal box.

What struck Saladin Ahmed was that a single brown corn pop was working as a janitor operating a floor waxer. Ahmed, current writer of Marvel Comics' Black Bolt series and author of 2012 fantasy novel Throne of the Crescent Moon, took to Twitter Tuesday to ask, "Why is literally the only brown corn pop on the whole cereal box the janitor? this is teaching kids racism."

Ahmed is right. Here that Corn Pop is:

Hard to argue with that. And when you look at the entire box, that janitor is indeed the darkest one.

But what, exactly, is wrong with being a janitor? And the more I look at that box, he appears to be the only one who has a job and is being a productive citizen in the entire Corn Pop world. Is there really something bad about that? Would it really have been better if he had been one of the Pops dropping things from the top deck, vandalizing kiosks, or just generally causing a ruckus? Apparently, someone showing up to work and performing their job admirably among chaos has now become something to be ashamed of.

Pancakes

Several news outlets reported on a sorority girl who died following a pancake eating competition. It was reported that she choked to death, though the descriptions of the incident said that she collapsed and began shaking. That doesn't really sound like choking to death. Nor does the fact that she died three days later. But the most shocking thing regarding this story was that the Toronto Sun decided to run it this way:

That picture is completely unnecessary, insensitive and borderline offensive. We all know what pancakes are. That looks like an advertisement for pancakes. A very effective advertisement. Also, nearly every one of the stories decided after reporting her death to focus on the fact that her father died in 9/11. Is that relevant? Why not just go with this story?

Transgression

Making widespread accommodations for transgendered people is ludicrous. These are people that need mental help. Every time there is a mass shooting, there is an outcry about how we don’t do enough for the mentally ill in this country.  So, why is it ok to ignore the obvious mental health red flags of someone who thinks they are something they are not?

2.6% of the adult population is considered to be bipolar. There are many medications designed to treat this disorder, and most people would consider it irresponsible to go untreated.  Even rarer are those diagnosed as schizophrenic, at 1.1%. According to the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH), Schizophrenia is a “chronic and severe mental disorder that affects how a person thinks, feels, and behaves. People with schizophrenia may seem like they have lost touch with reality.” Symptoms include: delusions and thought disorders (unusual or dysfunctional ways of thinking). Sound familiar?

So, while schizophrenia is a rare disorder, it is still nearly 4x more common than a transgendered individual.  Only 0.3% of the population is considered to be transgender. Instead of accepting this as a perfectly normal way of life, why not treat it for what it appears to be: a form of schizophrenia?

The acceptance of transgender identification is yet another example of providing little help for the mentally ill. Just because someone is not violent, doesn’t mean that they don’t need help. Placing a sign on a bathroom and welcoming them in does little to treat the underlying disorder.  There continues to be a stigma associated with mental health diagnosis/treatment.  Until we get past that, we will continue to be inundated with idiotic decisions like forcing children into a restroom or locker room with other children of the opposite sex.

Treatment is the key. The current plan appears to be worse than pretending that there is no problem at all. Embracing it as something normal would not be acceptable for someone who thinks they are a historical figure or that their neighbors are controlling their movements through magnetic waves, so why is it accepted for those with gender identity disorders?

NIMH offers this advice:

Here are some things you can do to help your loved one:

·         Get them treatment and encourage them to stay in treatment

·         Remember that their beliefs or hallucinations seem very real to them

·         Tell them that you acknowledge that everyone has the right to see things their own way

·         Be respectful, supportive, and kind without tolerating dangerous or inappropriate behavior

·         Check to see if there are any support groups in your area

That is what they recommend for schizophrenics. It appears appropriate for other situations, as well.

Trump v. Women .... Really?

According to Donald Trump, if abortions are banned, there needs to be "some form of punishment" for women who still have them.

That statement really set off a firestorm.  But what is so controversial about it? What other law in this country doesn't have some sort of punishment associated with it? You know.. besides entering the country illegally.

If alcohol were banned, there would be a punishment associated with possessing it. If green shirts were banned, there would be an associated punishment.  Without the punishment, there is no ban.

This is a completely fabricated controversy.



P.S.
I have really missed the boat on this election cycle during the past year.

WX

Patrick Crawford, a TV meteorologist at KCEN-TV, was shot multiple times during an altercation Wednesday in the Central Texas TV station's parking lot.

The Texas Department of Public Safety says the shooting occurred around 9:15 a.m. outside the rural studio on Interstate 35 near Bruceville-Eddy, 75 miles north of Austin. No motive has been determined and it is unclear if the shooter has any ties to the station.

The shooter, described as a white male in his 30s, fled the scene and police have not yet determined a possible motive. However, the most likely cause of the encounter was that the assailant ruined a new suede jacket after wearing it on a day that there was not supposed to be any rain.

Flesh Burger

Using testimonial information from various cannibal sources, a London chef has developed a hamburger that tastes like human flesh. Meanwhile, McDonald’s has been serving a hamburger that tastes like human spit for years.

Photos don't identify people?

A Pomeranian in Chicago escaped through the backyard and into an alley where it was grabbed by a stranger and ushered away before the dog’s owner could catch up. A short time later the abductor contacted the owner demanding $250 for the dog. The caller even threatened to shoot the owner if she got anyone else involve. Fortunately, the dog's owner did contact police, who helped her get the dog back.

"I just thank God I got my puppy back. When you have a puppy for a long time, a puppy is just like your kid," the dog's owner, a 66-year-old woman who asked that she not be identified, told DNAinfo Chicago.

Accompanying the quote of the owner who wished to remain anonymous:

Sensationalize much?

Federal agents say they have shut down two alleged human smuggling rings.

Cruelty?

William Buchman's Santa Ana neighbors had been complaining for a while about the dreadful smell coming from his home. The neighbors' complaints of the overwhelming stench prompted an investigation by the Department of Animal Services. A raid on the house uncovered the source of the odor... vast numbers of snakes -- some alive, most of them dead and decaying. Mice and rats were also in abundance.

According to the article, the snakes appeared to have not been fed in a while, yet the story said there were also numerous mice and rats in the house. I assume the rodents were intended to be food for the snakes, so why wasn't he feeding them?  He has two types of animals --snakes and rodents-- in his house that any normal person would want out immediately. One of them eats the other, so why on earth would he not allow (or force) that to happen?

But the real issue I have with this story is the guy being arrested. If they had walked into that house and every one of those snakes had its head cut off, there would have been no issue. He could have said they escaped and he feared for his life. I seriously don't think anything would have happened to him.  Even with the story presented as it was, I don't think he should have received more than a citation. Nobody who owns an animal should starve it out, but these are snakes, not dogs or cats (or horses).  I think laws should treat snakes and fish a little differently than other animals.

Every ant in every ant farm ultimately starves to death. Why is it ok for that to happen? Is that different than pouring salt on a slug?  Is that a crime, too? What if I catch a fish and throw it on a river bank and let it suffocate? Is that a criminal act?  Where can I find these laws just so I know what is acceptable and what isn't.

"Just once in college"

Last week, Conner Mertens, a 19-year-old red-shirt freshman kicker for Willamette (Ore.) University football team told his coach that he is bisexual and that he has a boyfriend. And on Monday he  announced it to the rest of the world in the name of helping and inspiring other LGBTI athletes, students, and people like him. According to outsports.com, no college football player in the United States at any level has come out publicly while still playing, until Mertens.

That’s all fine and good, but I have one quibble with Mertens. If he is gay and wants to help other people like him, why is he labeling himself “bisexual?” He is attracted to other men. He has a boyfriend. Why does he need this qualifier?

“Bisexual” seems to be a label that gay people apply to themselves when they are not fully comfortable with being gay. It is simply a more esoteric group and gives the impression that he doesn’t want to be labeled “gay." Why not be all-encompassing and just embrace your gayness? If you are going to make this statement with the “bisexual” safety net, why make it at all? And if he is uncomfortable with being gay, why should the rest of the populace feel any different?

Croc Attack!

Police have found evidence that "strongly indicates" a 12-year-old boy who was witnessed being snatched by a crocodile in a remote part of Australia was killed in the attack. Apparently this is news because everyone was expecting that the crocodile had simply taken the boy hostage and would be demanding a ransom.

In a statement, the police said they would not be specifying the “type of evidence located out of respect for the family." So, by dancing around the subject we are left to assume that they have found body parts around the water hole. Or maybe one vital body part. Or maybe a hunter killed a crocodile and when they cut it open they found another crocodile inside, and when they cut that crocodile open they found the boy inside. By not telling what they found, the police leave a lot to the imagination.  They have turned what should be a sad story into a Choose Your Own Adventure. That’s probably more disrespectful to the family than just coming out and saying that the crocodile ate the boy.

And at the end of the article, in a weird “if you enjoyed this story, you’ll also like…” cross promotion, CNN links you to two more Australian wild animal stories:

Australian boy says kangaroo saved him

Coroner rules dingo to blame for Australian baby's death

In a case of life imitating art, all of these stories have parallels to the Hollywood movies Lake Placid, Kangaroo Jack and A Cry in the Dark.

If anyone was offended by today’s entry, let me go ahead and apologize now for referring to Kangaroo Jack as “art.”

I love you so much…

...that I am signing up for a one-way ticket to Mars.

That’s basically what Ken Sullivan has told his wife, Becky. Ken is in a group of a thousand or so finalists for the Mars One project that could send him to the red planet permanently in about 10 years. Ken and Becky have been married five years and have four children, and that has apparently pushed Ken to the limit. He has decided that life on a desolate planet (or perhaps in a space capsule) is preferable to the little slice of heaven he carved out for himself here on Earth.

Obviously, things are a little rocky in this relationship. But Ken is a man of his word who views his wedding vows as a verbal commitment to his partner. They are, in both moral and legal senses, a binding contract. So he is going to ride this rocky patch out and fulfill his commitment to his wife, albeit from a planet 140 million miles away.

His wife is not really on the same page. “The question is do we get divorced now or get divorced later,” Becky told The Salt Lake City Tribune. Way to bail on your marriage at the first sign of a rough patch, especially when she seems to feel like her husband being on Mars wouldn’t be that much different than normal. “He already works out of town, so we’re used to the long-distance thing, but it would be hard when he doesn’t come home after awhile. I couldn’t do it, I couldn’t leave my kids, but I’ve spent every day with them, and he doesn’t, so I guess it’s different,” Becky told the Tribune, who Becky seems to think is her own personal marriage counselor.

This will give him the possibility to do something significant with his life. According to Ken, he sees this as a chance to explore, “and the opportunity to do something no one has ever done before, and making a name for myself would be nice to do.” Now you can start to see why Ken is so desperate to get out of Dodge. He has hooked his wagon to a shrill, petty harpy. He woke up one morning and realized he was Witness Protection-era Henry Hill… he gets to live the rest of his life as a schnook. But now he has found his escape.

Godspeed Ken Sullivan.

Do not have fun on Halloween!

Students at the University of Colorado Boulder have been told not to wear "offensive" Halloween costumes including cowboys, Indians, geishas, squaws or anything involving a sombrero.

Students have also been told to avoid "white trash" costumes and anything that portrays a particular culture as "over-sexualized" - which would seem to preclude most students from wearing their everyday attire.

They are also asked not to host parties with offensive themes including those with “ghetto” or "hillbilly" themes.  And in one final sweeping category, the university suggested no costumes associated with "crime or sex work." Apparently this was an effort to also eliminate dressing up as any athlete or politician.

This sort of hyper-PC move is obviously ridiculous and I don’t support it in principle.  However, I do take a little solace in the fact that the school has eliminated almost every conceivable costume not directly associated with Halloween. It would be nice to see some costumes that really get back to the spirit of the holiday.  You know, such things as ghosts, goblins, ghouls and witches.

Strike that… no witches. We wouldn’t want to unfairly stereotype or offend anyone at The Pagan Federation.

Not again

At some point this space will be used to talk about something other than transgenders once every few weeks. But this is really annoying me and it’s the only thing I have found worth addressing in my spare time. I’m not sure what it is that bothers me the most about these stories; the societal acceptance, the media’s presentation, or the lame-brained laws that are being put in place.

Let’s look at the most recent case. The headline in this Telegraph article reads, “Six-year-old becomes first transgender child in Argentina to change identity.” The headline of the story seems to imply that this six-year-old (Lulu) had the awareness to know what being transgendered is and had the wherewithal to do something about it by utilizing a new government law. The article states:

A six-year-old girl, who was born a boy, has become the first transgender child in Argentina to have her new name officially changed on her identity documents.

 

The article states that Argentina’s new Gender Identity Law enshrines the right to be identified by name and sex as defined by the individual. So that’s it?  That’s what it takes to become a different gender in Argentina? Obviously a six-year-old would have to have the help and approval of their parents to get this done. Which was certainly the case here:

The decision was made after Lulu’s mother, Gabriela, wrote to [the governor of Buenos Aires, Daniel Scioli] as well as Argentinian president Cristina Kirchner. She said her daughter identified herself as a girl as soon as she started talking.

Wouldn’t it be possible that this has all come about because of poor guidance from the mother and/or father? Maybe if they had been clearer about their child’s actual gender, the young boy would not have identified himself as a girl. Or maybe the parents just wanted a girl and decided this was the easiest way to have one. It sounds like some cruel experiment that nobody seems to be questioning the validity of.

While this whole transgender thing has not been fully clear to me, I was beginning to feel like I got it a little more… until this sentence showed up in the article:

Cesar Cigliutti, head of Homosexual Community Argentina (CHA), which supported the family, said Lulu’s case was “historic”.

So, is Lulu transgendered or homosexual?  They are two different things, right?  Not that I think a six-year-old’s sexual identity should even remotely be on anyone’s radar. The story really seems to highlight poor parenting and poor lawmaking.

It also raises another question, though. While I don’t agree with the events that transpired in Lulu’s case mostly because it deals with a six-year-old, what if a person like myself (a heterosexual male in his 30’s who looks and talks exactly like Burt Reynolds in Smokey and the Bandit) decided that they wanted to take the same steps? You basically just go to some government office and say you identify yourself as a certain gender and that’s it.You are now that gender. The M on my driver’s license would suddenly become an F and I would officially be a woman. I could freely shop in Victoria’s Secret, go into the dressing room and even the womens' restroom. Sure, I look and sound just like The Bandit, but if anyone had an issue with it, I would pull out my driver’s license and point to the F and reassure them, “Look, it’s not what you think. I am actually a transgendered woman. With a penis.  And I’m also a lesbian.”

The Syria situation raises some serious questions...

... like "What the hell has happened to John Kerry's face?"

Not to beat a dead horse…

…but this story is so absurd. You have to read this to believe it. I’m not sure Bradley Manning has officially changed his name to Chelsea or not, but does anyone at CBS realize that changing your name does not change your gender? Chelsea Manning is a man! That’s it.  There is nothing ambiguous about it. To pretend otherwise makes them look absolutely foolish.

I will assume Bradley has officially changed his name to Chelsea and refer to him as such, but what if Chelsea were to escape from captivity and CBS ran a story about that? According to their own reporting practices it would read something like this:

"Fort Leavenworth authorities are searching for an inmate who escaped on Wednesday. At about 11:45 a.m., Chelsea Elizabeth Manning escaped by walking away from an inmate work crew assigned to the field squad.

"Manning is a white female who is 5’2”, 140 lbs with short, dirty-blonde hair.  Anyone who sees this fugitive should immediately contact Fort Leavenworth officials."

How would that ever lead someone to this person?

This is really mind-boggling to me.  I guess in the minds of the people in charge at CBS, this person is black.

CBS is ridiculous

One day after being sentenced to 35 years in prison for the release of massive amounts of classified information, Bradley Manning has decided that he wants to become a woman. And that’s exactly the way it should be reported.  Despite What CBS would like to tell you, Bradley Manning is actually a man.

As I read this story I couldn’t help but notice something really strange. Somewhere between the time that I read the opening sentence…

“One day after being sentenced for leaking a large amount of classified documents to an anti-secrecy website, Army Pfc. Bradley Manning announced he intends to live the remainder of his life as “Chelsea Manning,” a woman, and begin hormone therapy as soon as possible.”

…and the time I got to the fourth paragraph…

“Manning is also requesting the public now refer to her by her new name and as a woman. She says she looks forward to receiving letters from supporters and intends to write back.”

…Manning’s gender had miraculously changed!  Just like that, in mere seconds. No hormones. No surgery.  Nothing.

I’m sure CBS thinks it is doing the right thing by immediately accepting this convicted criminal’s wishes, but if all it takes to become a woman is to declare that your new name is Chelsea, then why is there a need for hormones? According to CBS, Manning is already a woman. So I suppose they think he should be housed with female inmates for the next 35 years.

Wait a second…

This Manning fellow is a genius! And our media outlets are morons.

These People Lead our Country

Senator Brian Schatz (D, Hawaii): did you have carnal relations with that sheep?
“…most distasteful in view of the fact that the sheep was under 18 years old.”

By: Moe Lane (Diary)  |  August 8th, 2013 at 05:01 PM  |  49

No, I never thought that I’d have the opportunity to write that out, either.  But apparently this is the world that we live in, now:

Hawaii senator Brian Schatz involved in simulated sheep rape rituals

U.S. Senator Brian Schatz once led a fraternity that got into trouble with the law and animal welfare groups for threatening to sodomize a sheep.

One of the fraternity brothers involved in the incident claimed at the time that no actual sheep were sodomized in said ritual; and in truth I will be willing enough to accept a denial on Senator Brian Schatz’s (D, Hawaii) part. An explicit denial. As in, While I admit that there was in fact an official investigation along these lines, I have in fact never in my life [expletive deleted]ed a sheep.

And then we can all put this unfortunate incident behind us.

Moe Lane (crosspost)

PS: As near as I can tell: yes, Senator Brian Schatz (D, Hawaii) would have participated in a ritual where he would have had to decide whether joining his fraternity was worth [expletive deleted]ing a sheep.

PPS I’m sorry! This HAPPPENED! I can’t not write about this! I’m only flesh and blood!

PPPS: The subtitle is, of course, a classical reference.

Jerry Sandusky son files request to change name

The son of disgraced former Penn State assistant football coach Jerry Sandusky has filed papers to have his name changed.

Matt Sandusky filed a formal name change request this week, a little over a year after his father was convicted on 45 counts of sexual abuse. The disgraced former Penn State assistant football coach Jerry Sandusky was convicted in 2012 of sexually abusing 10 boys in a 15-year period. He is currently serving more than 30 years in prison.

Sandusky’s new name was not immediately known, but sources have indicated the most likely names are:

Chester Rubbentug

Jack Mioff

Pat McRotch

Ben Dover

Harry Johnson

Rubba Rubba

Phil McCrackin

Johnny Stroker

and

Gaylord Ferry

However, most experts believe he will just go with Michael Jackson.